Culture as an Art
While seeking guidance to navigate my college education, I met with the dean of the psychology department at California State University, San Bernardino. He was a tall white male in his late 50s, and I, a petite Hispanic female in my early 20s. During our first meeting, he kindly encouraged me to conduct research as part of the honors and McNair scholar programs. A couple of months later, I ran into him again, and he invited me to meet with him to discuss my graduate school plans.
Going through his office door, I noticed from my peripheral view that he had opened up his left arm. I also saw some movement on his right arm but did not perceive it fully. I instinctively reacted to what, in my mind, were the cues for a welcome hug. So I turned around and hugged him warmly. Given our height difference, it took me a second to notice how tense he became. It was then when the awkwardness of the situation fully hit me. I was jolted out of autopilot and, in my horror, I suddenly realized what he was trying to convey with his arm movement. On his left side, a row of chairs. He was inviting me to take a seat. With a rush of embarrassment, not truly believing what had happened, I let go of him and began laughing. Uncontrollably. For what must have been a minute. After regaining my composure, I apologized to him. I explained that people are very warm and open with their non-verbal behaviors in Colombia. I shared that we often kiss others on the cheek and hug people who have supported us.
This experience, and many others like it, highlight how moving to a foreign country required me to become aware of some of the cultural norms and reactions that I often took for granted. I pursued a career as a scientist and a clinical psychologist because it allowed me to seek an understanding of what we call “culture,” what we call “normal, and what we dare to call “abnormal.” This post describes my journey to arriving at a definition of culture that best fits me: culture as a tapestry.
Surrounded by a predominantly Hispanic community, I initially learned that word usage was different for Mexicans and Colombians. Particularly, curse words in Mexico were often used by Colombians as neutral, sometimes lighthearted, adjectives and vice versa. So, I learned to refrain from using words that were inappropriate around my Mexican friends. However, as my network grew in number, I found it more difficult to simply memorize information about other cultures. This is because the United States is one of the most culturally diverse places in the world. In addition to the many contacts from Latin America, I became acquainted with people from Nigeria, The Philippines, India, China, Iran, Japan, France, Thailand, and Egypt. The list goes on and on. The more I interacted with these individuals, the more I realized how little I knew about the cultural nuances, dialects, and even the individual preferences that often varied within a single group. In my face was the subtle realization that mere group facts were not going to tell me anything about the individual with certainty.
This realization led me to focus instead on being curious to learn about each individual. With caution, I still used the backdrop of learned cultural information to inquire about their thoughts on various cultural matters and if these were important to them. During my formal clinical training, I learned more about cultural humility and competence. These concepts describe a lifelong commitment to self-reflection and the questioning of our biases and attitudes so that we can learn about others without judgment. I soon came to learn that there are a myriad of factors that shape us, including our ethnicity, family, historical context, health, spirituality, education, artistic outlets, use of technology, politics, socio-economic background, and more. While connecting mindfully on these topics, I perceived glimpses of others’ worlds, values, and perspectives. On a professional level, I was honored to be present when my clients would arrive at insights about the factors that shaped them. Ironically, on a personal level, my inquiring also meant that my small talk standards were five times more intimate than average. On all levels, it was the beauty of contrasting others’ views with mine that would, in turn, inform my narrative about who I was and what I valued.
Through this process, I learned that our cultural expressions connect us, help us grow, and allow us to contribute to each other's lives. I also learned that culture was akin to a tapestry: a work of art in which we express what has shaped us and matters to us as individuals and communities. A tapestry that is dynamic and continuously changing as we interact with one another. Embedded in my section of this collective tapestry is the story of the accidental hug—a section I likely share with those who might have also experienced situations that made them question their cultural expressions. And just as I can curiously observe a work of art, so can I observe others’ sections of this human tapestry with wonder and awe.
Having fun with the metaphor
